"Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in."
as mentioned before, i've been contemplating lately about my future. this is probably the hardest life-altering decision i have ever encountered...and it's killing me. last week, i thought i knew what i wanted. i knew what to do. it was crystal.
somehow, as of this moment, i'm back to square one.
i keep thinking about the last 4 times it happened. the weighing of pros and cons. the endless discussions with close friends. and finally, the painstaking task of finding the right template. the process wasn't easy...but i never felt any level of uncertainty about it . i was anxious about my future. but i wasn't fazed about the decision.
2 years ago, i was a content call center agent surviving life one coffee mug at a time. having been on top of the QA charts, i was allowed to choose a schedule that suited my lifestyle. i never worked at night. i breezed through my work as it didn't require me to think much. but best of all, i always had money which allowed me to buy stuff, eat at expensive restaurants, and travel to different parts of the archipelago.
so...how come everything is in past tense?
3 words. quarter-life crisis.
i'm sure you can guess what happened next.
i remember it well. i had the letter in my hand the entire day. i prepared it the week before. i remembered buying time inside the girl's restroom, asking myself if this is the right thing. my hands were shaking as i handed the letter to my supervisor. i thought i was gonna have a heart attack. as it was signed and received, i felt the pressure leaving my body like a deflating balloon. i knew then and there, it was the best decision i ever made.
everything happens for a reason. i learned this the hard way. certain things in life must happen to drive you to the edge and force you to make important decisions . so many great things were present in my life back then. i had a steady job, a great set of friends and a one movie per week average. life was good. but shit had to happen. shit that drove me crazy. shit that i never saw coming. shit that brought me to a boiling point.
now that i think about it...it HAD to drive me crazy. it HAD to be a surprise. it HAD to bring me to a boiling point. otherwise, i wouldn't have any reason to do the inevitable. i was too comfortable. too content. too happy. there was no way for me to know that in a few weeks, agent schedules will no longer be dependent on QA scores. i wouldn't know that calls would gradually queue in the coming months (petiks mode will be be nonexistent) because other centers will close down. and most importantly...i will never in a million years predict that in 6 months , my account will be dissolved and agents will either be forced to resign or will be moved to other accounts.
fast forward to now.
too comfortable....too content......too happy. same as before.
mid quarter-life crisis.
it's a vicious cycle.
everything happens for a reason....what could it be this time?
somehow, as of this moment, i'm back to square one.
i keep thinking about the last 4 times it happened. the weighing of pros and cons. the endless discussions with close friends. and finally, the painstaking task of finding the right template. the process wasn't easy...but i never felt any level of uncertainty about it . i was anxious about my future. but i wasn't fazed about the decision.
2 years ago, i was a content call center agent surviving life one coffee mug at a time. having been on top of the QA charts, i was allowed to choose a schedule that suited my lifestyle. i never worked at night. i breezed through my work as it didn't require me to think much. but best of all, i always had money which allowed me to buy stuff, eat at expensive restaurants, and travel to different parts of the archipelago.
so...how come everything is in past tense?
3 words. quarter-life crisis.
i'm sure you can guess what happened next.
i remember it well. i had the letter in my hand the entire day. i prepared it the week before. i remembered buying time inside the girl's restroom, asking myself if this is the right thing. my hands were shaking as i handed the letter to my supervisor. i thought i was gonna have a heart attack. as it was signed and received, i felt the pressure leaving my body like a deflating balloon. i knew then and there, it was the best decision i ever made.
everything happens for a reason. i learned this the hard way. certain things in life must happen to drive you to the edge and force you to make important decisions . so many great things were present in my life back then. i had a steady job, a great set of friends and a one movie per week average. life was good. but shit had to happen. shit that drove me crazy. shit that i never saw coming. shit that brought me to a boiling point.
now that i think about it...it HAD to drive me crazy. it HAD to be a surprise. it HAD to bring me to a boiling point. otherwise, i wouldn't have any reason to do the inevitable. i was too comfortable. too content. too happy. there was no way for me to know that in a few weeks, agent schedules will no longer be dependent on QA scores. i wouldn't know that calls would gradually queue in the coming months (petiks mode will be be nonexistent) because other centers will close down. and most importantly...i will never in a million years predict that in 6 months , my account will be dissolved and agents will either be forced to resign or will be moved to other accounts.
fast forward to now.
too comfortable....too content......too happy. same as before.
mid quarter-life crisis.
it's a vicious cycle.
everything happens for a reason....what could it be this time?
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